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How Blessings Can Be a Curse.

rich-guyIt’s a fairly common saying. We say it without thinking about it and once we say it, we rarely change anything about our life. Really, it’s only something people in the western culture say.

“I saw how little they had and it really made me appreciate what I have.”

Typically, I’ve heard it from church folk after returning from a missions trip in some harshly impoverished third-world country. This is not to say that non-church people don’t say it, they do, but among us it shall not be so. I’m not suggesting that we not appreciate the blessings that God pours out on us. On the contrary, we ought to bless the name of the LORD for the good things He does and has done for us. We need, for our own humility and for His majesty, to remember and number our blessings before Him. Without doing that, we begin to think we deserve all we have and are, ourselves, responsible for earning it. What I am suggesting is that our blessings may not be for the sake of our comfort or even our own benefit.

For all of my Christian life I’ve been told that God blesses those He loves. But recently, as I’ve studied, I can’t find that. He disciplines those He loves, but I can’t find the blessings one (someone point me to it, if I missed it). I know that in Matthew 7:11 Jesus tells us that our “Father who is in heaven [will] give good things to those who ask him,” but I’m not sure that means we’ll get whatever we want. More and more, I tend to lean toward the idea that Jesus was talking about the good things that come with a life full of Him; love, forgiveness, wholeness, purpose, etc. No doubt God blesses us with other good things, material things, but because of Jesus’ communal and servant oriented character, I have a hard time believing that even the material things are wholly intended for us.

I’m convinced that other’s poverty and lack is not intended to make us appreciate our blessings more. Of course it’s ingrained into us to react that way. I’m guilty, 100 times over, of this very thing. I see another’s poverty and breathe a sigh of relief that it’s not me and never think a second thought about how my plenty might reduce their lack. I tried to figure out where we get this mentality from. I assumed that, like Christians often do, there was a passage of scripture that was taken out of context. Often it isn’t intentional, but it still carries the same ill effects.

In studying, I came across 2 Corinthians 9:8. It says, “And God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need…” If we read just this part, it’s easy to get caught up on the word “generously” and miss that it applies to what we need, not what we want. It’s also important to read the remainder of that verse, “…and plenty left over to share with others.” As far as I can tell, the promise is that we’ll have what we need to live and out of that there will be plenty left to share with other that are in need. That’s the NLT.

If we look at another translation, like the ESV, it actually translates a bit differently. It says, “And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.” When I read it that way it takes on a whole different context. Written this way it leads me to a place where God’s grace is the provision. It’s grace that becomes the resource that fills every need (emotional, physical, material, relational, etc.) and allows me to give, in large amounts (that’s the definition of abound) in EVERY good work. This means that not only can I meet a person’s material needs, but with God’s grace through Jesus, I can meet some of the other needs they may have.

povertydayUsing another person’s lack as a tool to remind us of our abundant blessing is a dangerous affair. It can easily cause us to retreat into whatever area we feel provides us with the security of our abundance. Most times that isn’s God. Often we’ll retreat into working harder, to earn more, so that we can ensure our prosperity. But that isn’t the way of the Kingdom. When Jesus saw another’s need, it didn’t cause Him to relish in the fullness of His divine provision; it caused Him to touch the unclean, to eat with the lowly, to give to the outcast. It caused Him to give from His abundance. When our blessing causes us to be relieved that we’re not “them,” than we’ve turned it into a curse.

Using another person’s lack as a tool to remind us of our abundant blessing is a dangerous affair.

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The song, Blessed Be Your Name, says “Every blessing You pour out, I’ll turn back to praise.” The only way we turn His blessings into praise is by pouring them out on those in need. When we do that, our blessing, given by Him, become about Him and glorify Him. Others’ lack ought to move us to react rather than relief.

What would it look like if others’ need moved us to reaction rather than relief?

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Katy Perry Isn’t a Christian!

katy_perryAmid the glitz and glamour of the most recent Hollywood gathering, musicians and stars strut the red carpet showing off the latest fashion of the designer that paid them the most. There are speeches made and jokes told and performances… performed, all for the purpose of sucking us into a world that “everybody” dreams about being a part of. And, somewhere in all that, awards are handed out. It’s The Grammy’s!

To be honest, I didn’t watch them. I was busy enjoying my birthday dinner at The Melting Pot (go there!) and watching the mid-season premier of The Walking Dead (watch that!).

 

But, even though I didn’t watch it, without looking for it, I know two things that happened.

1. LaCrae won a grammy for Best Contemporary Christian Music Performance/Song for the song Messenger. Bravo for that!

2. Katy Perry isn’t a Christian.

Well, I don’t know if that’s true, but I do know there are plenty of Christians that made sure to make that known after her remarks to Ryan Seacrest during her Grammy interview.  I won’t call anyone out in particular, but just check the google, the Facebook or the twitter and you’ll find it. Here’s what she said:

“It’s funny, I was praying and I got a word from God and He says, ‘You got this and I got you.’ And then I was on top of the lion and a guy, a random guy, just looked on me with a headset that I’ve never communicated with before and he just looked me straight in the eyes and said, ‘You got this.’ And I was like, ‘Oh, this is God confirming I can do this.”

(Article link HERE)

Because people are entitled to their opinions, they can say whatever they want, but as Christians, we ought to be careful who we say isn’t “in”. This isn’t about calling out sin, which is important, as long as it starts with yours (HERE is a blog on that). This is about making a definitive statement about the condition of a person’s heart and what Jesus might be doing in it. We simply aren’t allowed to do that.

Most of the comments revolve around the fact that Katy said she heard from God before her Super Bowl Half Time performance and how that does’t make her a follower of Jesus. While I agree that giving God “props” for a touchdown or winning an award doesn’t make you a Jesus follower, I would caution you to be careful when making a statement that excludes the work that God may be doing in them.

As Christians, when we say things that excludes someone from our “club” it does nothing but alienate them and ignores the might and majesty of God. Just because He may not be speaking to others in the perfect way He spoke to you, doesn’t make it less perfect. It makes it grace. When we do this, we trample grace. In that case, if grace is our business, it looks like we’re headed for bankruptcy.

In Katy’s case, she grew up in the church, as a Christian, singing christian music. I assume (and this is only my assumption) that at some point during that time she spoke to God and He spoke to her. So her saying she heard from God isn’t so far-fetched. I’m not saying she’s following Christ well, or even at all, just that she’s been exposed to the truth and knows the difference. And in that, Christ can work.

My friend Tori Karr said this on the article I posted on FB:

I believe we all fall away at some point in our lives, just not to this degree. Being lazy, living for ourselves, talking about others, etc. Katy Perry’s is just magnified because she is in the spotlight and she merely sings about what MANY Christians think on a daily basis, so struggle alone in your head or tell everyone all about it, we’re very similar. I’ve met several Christian artists who were less than pleasant to be around and I could argue they were not Christ-like at all (fame and fortune gets to them just like Katy Perry). I know that she doesn’t use her stance well but when she one day realizes she needs Christ fully, think of all the people who are following her that she may help lead to Christ one day. I’m on her team. We can judge her or we can hope for the best that she will one day “return.”

She’s smart. I have a lot of smart friends.

All that to say, God’s work in others is a mystery to us and we ought to view it as that… something that we know little or nothing about, but that amazes us.

Keep talking to God, Katy!

Dear Women, It’s All Your Fault. (An Open Letter)

Chivalry is dead

Used from www.sodahead.com

Dear Women,

I feel like it’s time that we address the real reason why “chivalry is dead,” why it seems to be okay to speak harshly about and to women, why men feel like they can say and do anything they want to women and why there’s a gross lack in our society of guys actually being men.

The truth is, it’s your fault. You’re responsible for all of it.

Over the last few weeks I’ve read a number of articles and blogs and listened to a number of speakers, not just men, on the topic and the collective opinion is that men act the way they do because you accept it and you’ve lowered the bar for how men should act. There is also the “boys will be boys” camp. And most recently the “it’s just locker room banter” camp.

Some of these writers and speakers may not have intend for that to be the message and some even tell men that they have a responsibility to behave a certain way regardless of what the culture deems acceptable. Others blatantly dismiss these obviously offensive and hurtful, sometimes criminal, comments and actions. All in all, the shared view seems to be that 1) either women are too sensitive or 2) if they were to set the bar higher and expected better of men, men would rise to the occasion.

What a Relief

As a guy I’m relieved, because that takes a ton of pressure off of me. I mean, if you women set the standard and tell me what I should be doing and than all I have to do is follow those rules, primarily while I’m around you, then sweet!

I guess what I’m saying is that it’s your fault and your responsibility to change it.

Your Issues

  • We don’t open the car door, because you stopped expecting it.
  • We don’t pay for dinner, because you stopped expecting it.
  • We don’t hold doors, because you stopped expecting it.
  • We would rather “hook up” than date you, because you stopped expecting it.
  • Pornography isn’t a big deal, because you started accepting it.
  • Sleeping around is cool, because you started accepting it.
  • We act like your body is ours, because you let us.
  • The way you dress reveals your level of invitation for us to “be boys.”
  • Referring to you as “bitches” is cool, because you started accepting it.
  • Guys knocking you up and then stepping out and making you a single mom is “just the way it is”, because you accept it.
  • Us refusing to take responsibility for our relationships, kids or our bills is acceptable, because you let it be.
  • Refusal to be monogamous and even adultery is commonplace because you let it be.
  • Refusing to grow up and sitting in our mother’s basement playing video games all day, until we’re 30 (which is really just prolonged adolescence) is the new “thing”, because you let it be.

We Should Absolutely Ignore This Stuff

Never mind that throughout history women have been viewed and treated as second-class citizens. Even if they were free, that often just meant they didn’t have to sleep in the slave or servant quarters and no one but their husband could punish them. It also doesn’t matter that in many countries women are still treated this way; not allowed to go to school, or drive, or be treated as human.

Never mind that for generations men have been applauded for their sexual exploits and prowess, meeting together to pat each other’s backs in recognition of their successful sexual conquests. Eventually we even titled them “studs”. All the while women were deemed whores and sluts and publicly ridiculed for something most “men” are held in esteem for.

Never mind men have always made the rules and they were rules that ensured women weren’t afforded even the most basic of rights.

Never mind that some priests and pastors misinterpret scripture like, “Wives submit to your husbands.” Then take it out of context and translate “submission” to mean “subservient.” Then give men the “permission,” for centuries, to use it to abuse and manipulate their wives.

Never mind that the absent father epidemic in our society have left boys to figure out manhood on their own and that the responsibility for that has been placed squarely of the shoulders of the gender that for generations have been told they aren’t in the same class as the men they’re supposed to be teaching.

Never mind any of that, somehow it is probably still your fault.

If This Were a Letter to Guys

If I was writing this letter to guys, I might say something like, being a man is your responsibility regardless of where women set the bar. The way that men have historically treated women is absolute garbage, completely unacceptable and our fault, because past men have propagated that behavior and we have accepted it. Guys, we ought to set the expectations for what it means to be a man and that only happens through real conversations between men and men AND women and men. Then we can start to hold each other, as men, accountable to those standards. We should not be okay with or accepting of any guy “just being a boy” or “locker room banter” because those “jokes” encourage and reinforce behavior that hurts, disrespects and violates women. Personally I believe that our example of manhood is Jesus (Click HERE for a number of blogs I’ve written on that topic), but if you don’t, at least maybe we can agree that we are failing to produce real men; men that respect and protect others. Maybe it is time that we raise the bar, because society, the women in our lives, and the next generation deserves that from us.

That is what I would say if I were writing this to men, but I’m not, so women, it falls to you.

But It’s Not a Letter to Guys

So, it seems like your failure to set the standard for us has devolved men into boys and caused men to act they way they do. There’s probably no other reasons, right?

Well, that’s it. I hope this was helpful and you are all more willing to change the way you’ve been acting. I wish you all the luck in the world, because no doubt you’ll need it… it is sure to be a heavy task.

Sincerely,
Men?

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